Failure is an event

threatened to pieces by change

 

People are often threatened by change.

The core of their being is fortified and stunted by just the idea of something new. Just watch them. Observe their eyes and their defensive posture.  Listen to what they say. Hear what they don’t say. Absorb and listen to their trembling excuses of fear.

It is always scary to look ahead, to go where you have never been. It is hard to move forward, to grow, to adapt, or transform yourself, especially when the comfort and experience of who you are, is right there, calling you back.

You don’t like who you are. Deep down, if you’re honest, you dream of being and living a more purposeful existence.  You hope for a new direction. You long for some kind of intervention, a sign in the sky, or perhaps a little push, from someone, anyone, in the right direction.  

The right direction.

But there is no right direction.

There is no such thing as the right thing to do, or right place to go, because change cannot be truly measured. It must be lived.

Success is something we are, not something we do. It cannot be measured, because our means of measurement changes with the passing of time.

Sure, you can count your money, your followers, or the square footage of your vacation property. You can count a lot of things, but that doesn’t mean anything. Through it all, you are the only constant. You are the only thing that matters. You are a person who needs to change, if you are to get to where you dream of being.

What do you dream of? Who are you? What is holding your back?

When you were young, you wanted mountains and mountains of candy. As you got older, you wanted a car, or perhaps a beautiful partner that could silence a room with his or her entrance. As you grew older still, you began to measure success by your health, the time you had to do what you wanted, and the people that gather by your side. Tomorrow, you will be different still.

Tomorrow, you won’t want the same things you wanted yesterday.  You won’t settle for yesterday, because tomorrow brings with it a new set of glorious possibilities.  Tomorrow, your very life will whisper some new possibilities of change.

The more wisdom you learn to embrace, the more you realize that life is about being, and not about doing. There is certainly a myriad of people that appear to better and more successful than you. They have more than you. They were there first. They know something. They managed to carve out their piece of the playground first.

But.

It’s not about them. It’s about you.

You are resisting your own magnificent conversion. You just won’t change. You run and hide. Choosing to be afraid of making a ruckus; of making a real difference. Whatever that difference is, you don’t have the courage to stare down your own greatness. You need to stop running away from becoming and being, who you were always meant to be.

You need to stop being threatened by change.

You refuse to let go. You refuse to embrace the temporary state of failure. You’ve been taught that failure somehow exposes who for who you are, when in fact, it is only a fleeting moment, in an unmeasurable ocean of time.

You seem somewhat arrogant.  Arrogant, to think you can learn to hammer a nail with only one, single, momentary, brilliant stroke of execution.

Let go.

Learn to hammer a lot of crooked nails.

Learn to leap.

Learn to fail and expect to fail often.

Learn to walk and dance with fear. To live and salsa with uncertainty.

Embrace change.

In the end, life is nothing but change.

 


no one will remember

 

One day it will all be a distant memory.

And it doesn’t matter what you do. 

It doesn’t matter if it what you experience today or lived out yesterday was good or bad.  Happy or sad.  Memorable or somewhat forgettable.

It doesn’t matter what you do.  It doesn’t matter, because everything, no matter how insignificant, how grand, embarrassing or otherwise, will one day be forgotten. 

Our mistakes and bruises, as well as our many disappointments and transgressions, will soon be forgotten and overshadowed by the art of living. 

You see, we were born with an expiration date.

We are no different than a carton of milk at the supermarket.

One of the great benefits of growing older, is not having enough time to keep track of every mistake or transgression that caused us to stumble. 

We were not granted the time to look back, or concern ourselves with what was, or what could have been.  It is not important.  We are people faith and hope.  Individuals living our lives forward and the future doesn’t depend on our past.

Even if you try.  Even if you persist and stomp your feet.  In time, everything fades, blurs, and becomes a distant passing memory.  The intensity of the moment fades.  We forget why, how, or how often.

So, it really doesn’t matter if what you experienced up to now has been virtuous or corruptible, joyful or melancholy, unforgettable or unremarkable.  It doesn’t matter.  What matters, however, is who you were and who you want to be.

You.

Not who you were but who you are.  Who you want to be.

I am not diminishing your real pain and the agony you might have suffered.  Far from it.  What you have endured and overcome is very courageous.  I am simply musing about the past, and how to leverage that experience and redeem the future.

It is really important to redeem our future.  It is important to hope.  To strive forward.

We simply cannot let the bastards grind us down. 

You have no right to hunt yourself down either.

All our actions and thoughts, ultimately end up in a rusty, unassuming, storage container, buried deep inside our unconscious mind.  Yet as we grow and dance with wisdom, our very character, the person who we are, who we have become and want to be, is ever more amplified and manifest itself ever more emphatically.

This is why, it is invaluable that we remember who we are, not what we have done, or what was done to us.   

We were born to be.  To be great.

For that reason, we must focus on our character, and developing that character, and not get hung up on our mistakes. 

Let the dead bury the dead.  Let the past remain the past.

No one will remember. 

No one will care.

Your memories will be a bit hazy too.

When you look in the mirror who do you see?  Do you see someone that makes you proud or do you avert your own gaze?  Someone memorable or forgettable?  Someone joyful or sad?

Don’t be so rough on yourself.

Remember that mistakes are events.  They happened. 

You are in the in the present.

The decision you make today, is not predetermined by what you did yesterday.

You are free to be.

Mistakes belong to the business of doing. 

Your life belongs to the art of living.

You won’t remember anyway, so take solace in your hope, by doing something today, that will make you into someone, you won’t hesitate to share tomorrow.

Forget your mistakes.  Don’t cover yourself with ugliness.  Don’t carry your regret and guilt alone.

Allow yourself to forget.

No one will remember.

Focus instead on who you are.

Who you dream to be.